Stay humble

The semester is over. Exams are marked, and lecture rooms are empty. I am sitting inside the cafeteria and looking at my student’s card. She gave me it as a thank you for a wonderful semester. The card says one sentence: “I find you to be very humble and for that I thank you!”

I stare at this card and these few words. I have never been thanked for being humble before. Why would she think I am humble?

I have never had any special approach to this student. She was a bit behind some of the assignments and I helped her with that, but only because she was working full-time as a school bus driver. She was silent during most of our books’ discussions. She did not come to see me during my office hours. We did not have one-on-one time really. And, yet, she was the only one out of 30 students to find me after the final exam and give me this card. When she was handing me the card, she said exactly the same words as written inside: “I really want to thank you for being humble.”

Humble…this word can mean so many different things. Do I teach in a humble way? Do I speak too quietly? Some students complained about that before, so I always increase the podium microphone to the maximum. Am I teaching humble texts? Is it my behaviour, my words, or actions? I guess I will never find an answer to that.

Is being humble a compliment? In our society, humble often means having low confidence and not enough ambition. Many companies do not want to hire humble people. They want overachievers, assertive people with a high self-esteem. Nobody wants to be humble. Everyone wants to be perceived as brave and successful. Strong and confident.

But after some consideration, I realized that being humble does not negate achievement, passion, or even ambition. You can enjoy success and still be humble. You can be humble in the way you treat other people. You can be humble in the way you show yourself to the world. You can be humble in the way you think or talk about yourself. Humble means less self and more other. Humble helps you love the world around you.

Take a moment to reflect on the past year and thank yourselves for being humble in any moment of your lives. Stay humble.

30 pairs of eyes

30 pairs of focused eyes. They are all concentrated on the task I gave them for the whole class. 30 students, 30 different lives. I see them 3 times a week, yet I do not know much about their lives outside academia. What do they love to read? What will they have for dinner tonight? All I know is their major, their attitude to class, their score, their skills in my class. Is it enough?

As an academic lecturer, I have to be professional and help my students with their studies and skills for future careers. I am not their mother, or therapist, or even their best friend. And even though there are moments and situations when a student opens up and shares some personal things with me, it is always an exception, rather than a rule. We keep it professional. Subordination.

Sometimes I wished I knew them better. I could have understood why she left the class earlier. Or why he did not want to take part in a group work in class. Why she was so upset with a “B+”. Or why he had a smile on his face for the whole class. Sometimes I want to know why he has tears in his eyes or why she has an absent-minded look. What moves them? What makes them come to class? What do they want to do in future?

I look at them and imagine their lives. Their parents, friends, and first love. I make up details in my mind – their hobbies, passion, and free time. But why? We meet 3 times a week – 3 hours together. I do not spend as much time with my friends or parents. Yet, little do I know about these 30 pairs of eyes. I wish I knew them better.